Friday, February 25, 2011

Do I need to follow?

I got this inspiration from a friend, a very dear friend that put sense in my life. She was telling me how it seems she hit the big 3-0 this year and it seems she didn't accomplish anything. Coming from Asian or even from my culture, accomplish means you are married and have children. No matter how good you are been educated or how much money you make, people will always see the relationship part. Being single in the city is fine but we are talking about Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia not London, Paris nor Helsinki. Where a women is like a price tag whenever a guy wants to marry her. If she is beautiful, the price is higher. If she is beautiful and educated (there's a price range from where she been educated oversea = higher) the price could put you on debt for the rest of your life.

As the time goes, people seems to be lean to the very traditional "price tag" but still no matter how metropolitan we, woman are, people always see if you have ring on your hand. If you are married before 25, you are "safe" from the constant nagging of relatives or even other married friends. I still remember one of my school friends why haven't I married yet and sarcastically, she said I really LOVE my job. So, I just shrugged and I told her it is not my priority and also because I don't feel like punching her beautiful face that day. *wide grin* ^_^

Do I really follow it just because? My sister is 5 years older and now that I am almost 3-0 next year, I kinda understand what she's been going through and it sucks. I am pretty much in " safe zone" now because I have a elder sister, who isn't married yet. The moment she will marry is the moment I wish I am deaf.

I am lucky though because my parents didn't push us to get married though in my case, because I lived with my bf, "bomb" is always aiming to me though after awhile I will diffuse it and said "I want to work first, husband second" but then the brilliant people who hold that power refuse to let me forward and so now everything is complicated but I still refuse to say "I'm done, we should do it next time, call me" and it leads to fatigue of life. I am tired to positive some time. One day I just hate everyone and everything and cry my heart out, I am mad at the world and I am mad at higher power , I hate the idea of "everything is going to be fine" because I am that tired. I am tired to be spineless. I am truly tired. Though it wont lasted once I get my chocolate kisses, but being tied down by culture is truly amazing piece of work. don't you agree?

Anyway, I learn to care less about this "rules", I don't know what kind of ring that I want or wedding that I want, I don't care if my price is reduce because you know why. I just want to live and experience life, the whole deal of my culture being too uptight of woman being married is overrated. They make us , "the unmarried" feel hopeless for romance and leads to unwanted marriages. Hell to that. Being married just because every one is doing it is like playing with yourself without imagination or pornography and you will never come.

So, following people is not good thing.Follow your heart is. I know in my heart my friend will meet someone that will rock her world or not, as long as she is happy with her life, I am happy and to hell with RULES. We make our own Rules, remember, Mazian? I love you , babe!


  1. same old question..believe me..ever since I worked in a gov sector..the word MARRIED gives me the chills..I hate it when people ALWAYS ask me about getting married and stuff like when ur peers keep
    on babbling about getting married,reading through wedding mags,planning getting married while i'm still bf-less..or if they are married..they will brag about how romantic their husbands are bringing flowers to i care? i don't think so..just keep those things to yourself..
    it gets worse when i have to work in a place far away from KL for 6 months..and all people do there is asking about boyfriend and getting married..i get this a lot from old lecherous's mum is ok with it and why u bother about me being single?

  2. Perhaps they think they are better than us and trying to rub their "happiness" on our faces or perhaps they just a "concerned" women. I doubt that. ^_~
    Malay: tang laki plak, gatal nak tanya... haha kot2 diaorg rasa bole "tambah" koleksi dalam calon2 menjadi bini ke2. sedey sungguh. sabo ye..

  3. THANK YOU SHERRY!!!!!! it means a lot to me that u understand what i'm going through.... :(

  4. ur most welcome, cik yan. aku pun takkan lepas akan soalan yang sungguh menyakiti hati dan ada segelintir yang kekadang segaja nak buat kita pressure. I'm totally with you. So, it is better to find yourself and experience life... because kalau ikut sgt "rules" ,tak tentu lagi happy, ye tak?


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